Dear Therapist Post… January 3, 2012
Posted by LexiAnnRe in : Blogs On Posts In The PC Forums, Dear T Posts , trackbackDear T…
I gave Todd away… They came to pick him up a little while ago..
I came back in and couldn’t stop crying..
My throat was so dry but my sinus’s were so ick!
Abby was there for me though.. She sat next to me and pawed at my shoulder and would mew ever so sweetly!
I still hurt over it… but i’m out of tears.. and i’m tired… when i get too upset, theres this localized sezure thing that happens in my diaphragm that makes me sound like i might hyper ventilate, but i never do..
I used to get spanked for that… My biological mom would get pissed because i couldn’t stop it.. I got used to holding my breath then my stomach would just hurt as it does this funky pump like thing and then when i gasp for breath more hiccuping like sobbing sniffles coming out until i can catch my breath and hold it again.. My throat ends up hurting from all that and so does my tummy… I guess my mom thought that i was doing it on purpose all the time.. I sure wouldn’t spank my child for crying then what sounds to be hyperventilation… that’d be like slapping a baby because they were crying because you slapped them in a first place…
I called the crisis line earlier today before dark… before todd left too.. I was hoping to get help.. but the call ended with a just hang in there… then i tried again, and got no where again… maybe because when i tried again, i couldn’t speak and had to hang up the phone..
I really screwed myself over with this shopping spree i ended up doing today.. and im thinking this mess with all the cold turkeying the meds, might be the cause of all the problems that just came up within the past week and a half… …. I can’t do this alone.. I truely believe I need to be inpatient now… I shouldn’t have turned you down sharply when you mentioned discussing hospitalization… Is that why you never called back? because of how I acted over that?
Falling in the slump again,
LonelyStar1987
Comments»
no comments yet - be the first?